DON’T Do It Afraid! How Your Fear Can Kill You in Deep Water

Some brilliant, well-meaning people will tell you to “do it afraid.” They ask you to let the fear be there, but execute anyway. They urge you to channel the energy of the fear towards the required action. There is a place for this approach even when the stakes seem high. For example, public speaking in front of a large crowd, asking for the promotion, or quitting your job to start a business. But when it is a matter of life and death—like being in deep water—you cannot afford to do it afraid. Because afraid will kill you. Maybe not today, but eventually it will drown you. You must learn to overcome the fear itself.

When you are immersed in deep water, your Thalamus alerts Amygdala that this is a situation where you might not be able to breathe. Your Amygdala forwards this tip quickly to Hypothalamus who in turn triggers the FFF response. The problem with Fighting, Fleeing, or Freezing in deep water are as follows:
(1) The body’s response: Your body gears up to fill your lungs with air for that fight or flight. But there isn’t air, you are in water above your head. Taking the water into your lungs is the first step to drowning.
(2) Fight: Fighting the water is a fight that you can never win. The water is always stronger and will tire you out.
(3) Freeze: Immobilization while immersed in water is counterproductive. You will eventually run out of air and shortly begin to drown.
(4) Flight:
a. Physical Flight: The automatic way your body knows to take flight is via running. The running motion is inefficient in water. You can’t run in water which is why you end up looking like a thrashing maniac.
b. Mental & Spiritual Flight: If you take flight by escaping your body (“a blackout”), then you are not available to keep your nostrils and mouth closed. The water gets into your lungs through your nostrils and mouth, and starts drowning you.

The problem with the FFF response in deep water is that you DROWN. Your natural fear programming will drown you in deep water.

“PUSHING THROUGH” DESPITE YOUR FEAR OF DEEP WATER

Now let’s say you feel afraid but decide to continue to “push through” that initial desire to fight, flight, or freeze. The detectives are now on deck with their investigation. They check out the water. Yes, it’s deep; your feet can’t touch the ground. They check out your beliefs. Nope, you don’t believe that you can float. Sensory Cortex and Hippocampus compare notes about what’s happening now with notes about your history, and can’t find any evidence for why you should NOT be afraid. So, they shoot off their recommendation to Chief Amygdala: You are unsafe, and your initial fear response was valid. Your Amygdala reinforces the initial message to Hypothalamus: Continue the FFF response.

So if you believe that you don’t float, but you still decide to “push through” the initial fear, here are your scenarios:
(a) Panic will eventually set in. Your body continues to attempt to fight, flight, or freeze. You drown;
or
(b) You survive the experience, but it is recorded in the annals of your memories that you had cause to be afraid while you were in deep water. These are records that Hippocampus, in her infinite wisdom, will pull up the next time you’re in water. You just provided her with another piece of evidence that deep water is unsafe and is a place where the FFF response should be triggered. You reinforce your brain’s fear mechanism.

It is for this reason that you should never, ever push anybody into deep water. Not in jest, not to flirt, not to teach them to swim. Don’t do it! It does more harm than good. You have heard the motivational speakers. They urge you to do the challenge, despite the fear: ask for the raise anyway, ask her out anyway, go in for the first kiss, jump from the plane. In most cases, this mindset will serve you well. But it won’t in deep water. First, you must learn to overcome the fear itself. Five Firm Foundations For Freedom From Fear is a course that helps you do exactly that. It teaches you how to avoid panic and learn to enjoy yourself in water. The course enrollment page can be found here.